Surname: The egg.

Older: Born on the 4th of January.

Appearance: Bigger than Kylie Jenner.

And how tall is Kylie Jenner? Smaller than the egg.

Hey, that's Pass Notes, not a Zen Koan. We are sorry. Approximately 1.68 m (5 feet 6 inches).

That's a big egg! What are we talking about here? Godzilla? Mutant Emu? Instagram.

Woah! Instagram now has the ability to breed fallopian tubes? You really do miss the part of the format "intentional misunderstanding" today, right? Should I just explain what the egg is?

Yes, please. The egg is a picture of an egg that has just broken Kylie Jenner's record and is the most popular Instagram post ever.

And from "The whole story" What do you mean Instagram was invented there. So, about eight years.

What is so remarkable about this image of an egg? That's just nothing. It's just a photo of an egg, the only image ever posted by @world_egg_record, next to the caption: "Let's set a world record and get the most popular post on Instagram."

Am I missing something? Yes. They miss a deliberate hierarchical disorder. The egg was probably successful thanks to the same impulse, the Rage Against the Machine kill in the name for Christmas no. 1 made in 2009. Users (who recognize themselves as #EggSoldiers) sick of Kylie Jenner's ubiquity are behind the most banal picture imaginable, with the explicit intention of dethroning them.

And now they have succeeded? Absolute. Jenner's post got 18 million likes, but The Egg is now at 26 yards and counts.

And what was Jenner's favorite post? An image of the hand of her newborn daughter gripping her finger. Ha! We purposely undermine the happiest day of her life! Lolz!

And the The great thing about Instagram is that there are definitely no boring imitations. You clearly did not see @world_record_eggsmotheer [sic], an account that has posted a picture of a chicken ("the mother of the egg") to get more likes than @world_egg_record. It currently only has 17 likes and 5 comments.

Sometimes I really hate the internet a lot. But is not that fascinating? The whole is a captivating microcosm of our collective online behavior. If we investigate it properly, we will surely find that we …

Nope. You're right. I also hate the internet.

Say: "The egg has definitely proven that Instagram likes are not a true reflection of true value."

Do not say: "Watch out for The Egg's new reality show, Negging The Egg, which starts on E next week!"